Behold, a book:


Swallow

A man and a dog walk through a medieval village; tilia trees bloom in all the parks and their fragrance fills the village. Man: What’s this? Hello! The man and dog pause, bend down, and inspect a baby swallow on the pavement. Man: Hello! Swallow: Chirp. The man stands...

In which a father and a daughter hold hands

A girl and her father walk down a rocky road towards a waterfall and a river swimming pool. Girl: Hold my hand. Father: What? Girl: I said, hold my hand; you aren’t listening to me. Father: I was thinking about something else. Girl: This road is too rocky and I might...

Madrid, Blur

Madrid cafe - September Two people sit in the sunlight of a cafe. Woman: When young, people would look to me--I would feel them look to me. On a bus I would not push the button--the button to stop--because I know they were, anyone, look to me. I would ride the bus to...

In which a hippie says good afternoon

The setting: a beautiful park next to a river where a picturesque waterfall spills into a deep pool crossed by an old Roman bridge under which two white swans swim in the dappled reflections of a sunset beyond the distant hills. Two women sit on a park bench nearby...

In which Ewan McGregor visits moi in a dream

Ewan McGregor approaches with a smile and gives Moi a big hug. Ewan: It is SO good to see you again! How have you been? Moi: Oh, you know... We stayed in some houses for a year during quarantines, but we are living in our van again. Traveling around like old times...

Kombucha

German, speaking in German: This kombucha is good. American, speaking in Portuguese and then in French: I speak Portuguese and English. I’m sorry. My name is Mr. Cheese. Haha. German, speaking in French: I like to curse in French, but prefer German or English for...

Rueful Archer

Rufus cries softly into a wineglass late at night. A computer sits open before Rufus upon which he has just binge-watched a full season of Archer. Rufus: How did this happen? Why? Rufus shuts his computer, slurps wine, and lets the tears roll down his cheeks. Dermot:...

Panaché

A group of guys sit around a table and discuss how to rebrand the beverage 7-Up. 1: Seven up. 2. Oh, god, where do we get these clients. 3: They pay super well, though, right? 4: Let’s move on, ya’ll, from all those negativities and just do the job. 1. Do the job?...

How is Jeffrey Bezos more productive than you

Two friends sit in a café terrace and look at their phones. Guy: Hey, can you guess what three things Jeffrey Bezos has that make him more productive than you? Friend: Lots of money, an enormous floating mancave, and an attractive office assistant? Guy: Wow, how did...

The Gerasimov Doctrine

Putin: Oh god. Putin rubs his face in his hands. Putin: I just remembered, I have to have a meeting with the new US president next month. General: Sir, don’t stress; let’s just follow the next step of the Gerasimov Doctrine? Putin: What’s the next step for the...

Anne of Green Gables

A reader discusses the book Anne of Green Gables with a viewer of the Netflix show Anne with an E. Reader: When I started the book, I wondered if the woman who ran the orphanage didn’t purposefully send Anne out to Green Gables in order to teach her a lesson—that is,...

Biology

A biologist and an activist discuss genetically modified mosquitoes together. Biologist: There is some hope because we are releasing modified mosquitoes into nature. Activist: It won’t work; it has been proven that the treatment only lasts for three years and then...

I don’t smoke–like the above photo suggests–, but everything else is true.