STARWARS

A son and his mother read in different parts of the house. They yell at one another.

–Hey mom!

–I’m reading!

–I know: me too.

–Are you?

–Listen to this opening sentence–

–I’m reading my own book!

–“The man, who was not a man, spoke to the bejeweled lizard, who was not a lizard, and asked, ‘Have you seen my lightsaber?’ “

–You’ve got to be kidding.

–I’m thankful: it is all down hill from here!

–Are you sure: sounds like a low point.

–But how can it get any more horrible?

–That’s what I’m saying: it is a low point.

–Oh.

There is a brief pause.

–Mom, I’m worried.

–I’m trying to read!

–Chemo’s made you sarcastic.

–Actually, I prayed for nerd children.

–Hey! That hurt my feelings!

–I wanted my old age to be one long, glorious Nerdfest.

–I’m only reading this book as a favor to my brother.

–It is book number three.

–They are connected!

–I’m sure the Force told you to read it.

–No, the Force doesn’t talk: it is emotional–

–I’m getting an emotion right now.

–Trust your feelings, Luke–I mean, mom.

–Luke, I am your mother.

–No, mom! No!

–Luke, come to the quiet side.

–Don’t you mean Dark Side?

–The quite side: the side where people are quiet. So they can read in peace.

There is another pause.

–Mom?

–I’m reading!

–I just farted.

–I was wrong: this is the low point.

–What color would my lightsaber be, mom, if I had one?

Another pause.

–Mom?