Utopia

A philosopher drives his spouse through the countryside on a Sunday afternoon. Philosopher: I should write an essay about utopia. Defining a utopia helps one define one’s own personal ideal; of course, reaching an ideal in this life is impossible, but it would be a...

Selling a caravan

A caravan owner works on his van outside of his house. A stranger pulls into the driveway, exits the car, and begins the following conversation: Stranger: Excuse me, can I ask you a question? Owner: Yes, sure thing. Stranger: Are you busy? Owner: I’m just fixing this...

Gala, gay-la, gaila, gaga

Dermot and Rufus sat in the back of a cab and looked out the windows as they made their way uptown to the university gallery. The city looked just the way it always looks in September, which is how it looks every other season, too: lots of cement and glass. The only...

Portuguese wine tourism

A tourist sits at a table with a friend and swishes the last of his wine and thinks how to answer the question just asked of him. Tourist: Yes, I picked grapes in Alentejo. I HAD hoped to learn to make Vinho de Talha; I HAD hoped to learn a few important phrases and...

Shopping

Two customers walk through a home improvement retail store; they wear face masks, push a cart, and search for a customer service representative. 1. How long have we been in here? 2. Who knows? 1. God, if I could just breathe fresh air or feel the wind on my face...