In which Johnny asks for lemon and syrup

The philosopher’s cell mate, the local drunk Johnny, stands in the jail cafeteria and waves a hand at the cook. Drunk: Excuse me, darling! Cook: I’m a dude, man. Drunk: I knew that…? Cook: What? Drunk: This gruel is great; I love it; could you add a slice of...

A well-met forest

A woman drives a car up a dirt road into a forest. She parks, walks a ways into the forest, pees, and says: Woman: Ah, well-met, Forest! As she pulls up her trousers, the pines sigh in a gentle breeze. Birds chirp. Two oak leaves flutter down and land on the woman’s...

In which Moi offers helpful observations to a small human

A school; Moi approaches as a small human cries wildly near the door. Moi: Hey, little tiger, why are you crying? Small human: My m-mommy is so selfish! Moi: It isn’t any of my business, but I have some helpful observations, which I would love to observe upon you....