In which a troglodyte reads Jordan B Peterson

Dawn. A thousand years in the future. A knoll in an oak forest. Granite boulders loll about where an ancient cataclysm tossed them. A half naked troglodyte, piebald and weary, limps up the knoll and sees a text engraved on a stone. The troglodyte approaches, knocks...

In which the philosopher and Johnny share a bottle of wine

Philosopher: I miss your giggle; when you came here—the first couple of nights that you were here—you giggled all the time! Johnny: I can’t giggle anymore; I lost the little spark of je ne sais quoi which gave me my effeminate charm. I think it was when my ex-wife...

The well: in which Teresa and Irene walk home

Irene and Teresa walk home from school a few days after they both fell into a well. Teresa: Thanks for jumping into that well to save me. Irene: That’s okay; my dad asked me to watch over you. Teresa: Why? Irene: I can’t really tell you that, but I was the one in...

A well-met forest

A woman drives a car up a dirt road into a forest. She parks, walks a ways into the forest, pees, and says: Woman: Ah, well-met, Forest! As she pulls up her trousers, the pines sigh in a gentle breeze. Birds chirp. Two oak leaves flutter down and land on the woman’s...

In which a bitcoin miner visits the incarcerated philosopher

The philosopher sits on his jail bed. His cell mate, the local drunk, stands in the corner thumbing a phone. A bitcoin miner enters the jail and approaches the cell bars. Miner: Are you the philosopher? Drunk: No, I’m just here for the food and the wifi. Philosopher:...