Los Angeles. In an apartment building, a sad adult pauses to read Google News during a busy working day at the home office. He reads the following:
Headline: Popular Japanese biker turns out to be 50-year-old man using face app. Revelation makes fans love him more.
The sad adult has to read this headline five times before he understands the meaning, and upon understanding, said sad adult does the darnedest thing: he shuts the computer, disconnects the power supply, walks to an open window, and frisbees the computer out into the open air.
The computer, along with Google News and all other internet-related BS, spins through the open air for some time. Finally, the spinning computer comes down with a crack, tink, and clatter on the asphalt of the parking lot below the shoebox apartment where the sad adult lives out his sad few remaining days. Immediately afterward, a passing car rides over the computer, Google News, and assorted internet BS with a refreshing crunch and a rather violent pop as if something substantial breaks in two pieces under the weight of the car. The sad adult watches these events with a stoic face and then says quietly to himself:
Adult: Popular computer model tossed like a frisbee by adult; day immediately becomes better after.
After a moment of looking out over the parking lot with a blank expression on his face, the sad adult speaks again saying:
Adult: Computer frisbeed out of window by adult whose day immediately improves.
The sad adult begins laughing to himself and says:
Adult: Computer slammed by news-phobic adult; systemic oppression revealed.
And then the sad adult begins laughing insanely, calms himself eventually, and takes an enormous sigh of contentment. Upon sighing, a large gnat enters the adults throat. The sad adult coughs violently, doubles over, loses his balance, falls out of the window headfirst to the pavement below his apartment, and so ends his sad few remaining days.